spaced out

i feel like I'm in outer space
orbiting the planet below
the subtle beep I've grown to enjoy
is a lie i pretend to know
as i stare at the earth
i dream of falling toward it
plummeting to a fiery death
in a manor most morbid
i am avoiding the truth
because it makes me sad
i really am falling
but the earth is so fast
the key to flying
is to miss the earth
thats the logic satellites use
but they don't mind
their mood inert
need company only to replace a fuse

Falling this Summer

i ponder while i wander
my brain doesn't want to rest
giving it my all
doesn't mean I've done my best
i guess ill get on the road
this cities already burnt down
i don't have certainty
which is why i wander around

but thank you for reminding me of my practice

i will keep my beginners mind
i will learn what i came here to
i will be kind to others
break the borders of "me" and "you"
theres nothing that can stop me
I've chosen the rabbit hole
my ego awakened in awareness
all in cahoots with my soul

as i fall, fall, fall
i see it all
its only when i stop
i think I've reached the top

i sway east and blow west
the cold wind whipping from the north
pressing my direction south
still always pushing forth
in a steady gravity
i find me translucent
heavily right brained
I'm doing what the left cant

a spirit in human form
the form still yet inaccurate
testing the limits of infinity
defining ones own brackets
i say yes to your answer
i question your query
staple my mouth shut
much to your fury

but
as i fall, fall, fall
i will see it all
its only when i stop
that i fear the drop

palms

i say good sir
panic your manic
did you hear my news?
i haven't heard anything from me
i'm blindly looking so why can i not see?
but who are you and am i we are thus nothing at all
to someone not i but you can seem to fly
to the south my little mockingbird
disregard all you heard
maniacally panic
as you were

the peace will come
with waves much smaller
don't stress over small stuff
stand strong stand taller
everything will be ok
keep your waves calm
sitting cross legged
i focus on my palm

embrasure

i walk into this crowded room
words keep flying at me
i say my piece then intend to leave
my heart feeling the atrophy

their minds all wander
as my words are squandered
syllables fall on deaf ears
my cries for help
become a muted yelp
enriching my greatest fears

yet my silence
yells quite loud
as if my words are useless
i lack the discipline
that it would take
to just remain this muted

i guess ill wait
try not to taint
the loneliness held inside
i feel so faint
but i will embrace
whats trying to take me for a ride

no stress

i flow in and out
my mind unable to post what i say
verbally in disarray
what shall i do
when its awkward to stay?
i do not need to leave
my friends will all do fine
with me without me
drink from their steins
and have their good times
after shots eating the limes

too much flux i need smaller waves
too much mood i need more weed

too bad you say
i disappoint somehow today
the beaten path
the only way
but i stray
i think too much i guess
dreams of apes
all too dumb to dress
sending their calls of distress
i'll be home one day
but right now its too soon to say

silence

this road holds rocks
travel lightly if you can
i know the hills wind
but you'll get there in the end

stories told
come with fears of deaf ears
more unfolds
as i continue on through the years

i remained silent unless silenced

we find new places
all of us are one
familiar faces
with familiar fun

we make our journey
as travelers have before us
to undo all we knew
leaving me evermore curious

i became silenced while silent

as i grow and learn things to show
an arsenal of lessons to teach
i question how can i give while as long as i live
i cannot comprehend my own speech

i may get through
though frustratingly so
what i convey to you
is not all i know

i silenced myself by not being silent

we search our past
for the stories we tell
tales of our tears
emotions we yell

we describe ourselves
as the creations of the past
but these are just stories
feelings not meant to last

i become silent when silenced

the journey we have
none of us the same
is to discover ourselves
and wade through the pain

we can overcome
eventually can conquer
let go of expectation
give all you can offer

i will remain silent even if i'm not silenced

found my way home

to be or not to be
this question finally answered me
to all of those
who knew no clothes
we are who we want to see
be positive
for love is the answer
all those who come to your hilt
why not fight this cancer
your hate will drive you mad
anger causes suffering
love is the way home
all of us drunkenly stumbling
to a destination away
clicking our heels
saying what we say
theres no place like home
i wont rest til i arrive
but you are always here
just observe the hive

oh so many bees
always jumping onto me
surrounding their queens

the honey must be made
the wax there for storage
but its ok to envy
those who set out to forage

THE TRUTH

you reside in my mind all of the time

you don't pay your rent, and we meet on the fly

and you intrigue my eyes

my ears want to cry

the beauty in your words

the syllables all smile

at least thats what i heard

not even a scream can describe my feelings

the most romantic of whispers fail to compare

you want me to stay?

then i'm not going anywhere

but the way you're looking

is just too unfair

you have smooth friendly legs

they dance when they like

your smiling face

not noticing mine

your warm kind hands

throwing all your words

they cool my heart

and heal its burns

your fantasmal mind

and translating tongue

always challenging

creating new fun

Claire,

where the hell did you come from?

i may say it a lot

still can't be more true

i am so amazingly

in love with you

sharpie me i'm in love

i wander now
my thoughts forever more
the translation from right brain
obscured and told the score
to be a human
in this magnificent life
to be forever in love
to eliminate times strife
i am free of my old chains
and here i've gained new
cleaning my pasts stains
while thinking of you
i never would have gotten here
if it weren't for your love
telling me what's what
when push came to shove

for this i am grateful
because of this i have grown
because of this

i am in love

tomorrow beach

under where you tide

my side

the splits that reside inside

why do we lie to ourselves

and deceive your inner child

telling them they are wrong

they can not run wild

who are you to say 

binding your inner mind

let go of your ways

tomorrow's s too late

when every day is today

its time i ramble on

toward where i came

to my destination

the one i can not leave

i am always home

earth is my house

i reside inside

my minds eye

always killing my time

the constant wars

and perpetuating paradox

a consistent cycle

leads me here again

i am always here

i am always home

home is where i roam

yet if i could tell you 

the things that i think

my ponders wildy growing 

threatening to sink

flowing and breaking

like waves of strange horror

splashes of glee throwing me

to an undertide of love

to wake again

on the beach of tomorrow